when you should be lifting up.

a cesspool of insecurity,

jealousy

and judgment.

that is not how strong women

treat other women.

behavior that is a product of

a girl who never became a woman.

of a girl who doesn’t love herself enough

to appreciate the value of others.

what a crying shame,

for nothing good ever came from treating your own kind

as a doormat for your twisted behavior

and irrational mind.

 

letting go of things toxic.

 

i let you in,

but now i have to let you go.

i have to let you go because you hurt me far more than you made me happy.

i loved who you could be

instead of who you are.

i tried so hard to make it work

but i got stepped on one too many times.

and life is too short

to try and help people that don’t want to be helped

to try and make people realize what they already know

but aren’t ready to admit to themselves.

to walk around with dirt on my face

pretending that i am ok with you being in my life

when you brought me down so often

that losing you felt like more of a relief than a loss.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The White Dress You’ll Wear

We say that things aren’t going to change,

because we desperately don’t want them to.

We don’t want to believe that we may never be the same,

that all of the plans we made aren’t already on their way out the door,

better suited for someone else.

That maybe our foundation isn’t as strong as we thought.

And every day,

I try to put myself in your heavy boots,

hoping that maybe one day I’ll understand the weight you gave to him

and why you made the choice that you did.