When you meet someone that makes you want to be better,
that makes you want to be more,
to be happier,
don’t let them go.
Don’t wonder if they want you.
Don’t walk away from the chance of being more
and run toward the chance of regret instead.
are so much better than that.
I can’t think of a better word to describe life than scary.
Even when we’re happy,
or in love,
we’re all so f*cking scared.
It’s like the only way to be alive is to be scared.
It’s like fear is a requirement to pass the test of life.
We’re all ok.
We have it all together.
If having it all together means being terrified every step of the way.
I said sarcastically,
“I have great taste in men.”
He said sweetly,
“No, you’re a fixer.”
I’m happy to know you,
but scared to lose you.
I know that you have to move on,
to follow your heart and grow.
‘Cause life just keeps on going.
But it seems like people go
right when you start to keep their favorite food in the kitchen.
And the next thing you know,
you’re sitting with a bushel of bananas,
watching them go from green to yellow
and wishing that person would return before yellow turns to brown.
it takes a while to understand
why they say what they say
and do what they do.
And then one day,
you become more forgiving,
Because you realize that they are just humans,
who love others the way they were loved.
And most often,
it was a love dictated by demons
who gave them the wrong definition of the word.
He put you in a box since the day that you were born,
and trained you into thinking you belong there.
Even as you grow up
and go off on your own,
his voice still echoes in your head
with every decision that you make.
I just want you to know that black and white are not the only colors,
that there is more than right and wrong.
I want you to feel free
and always remember,
he is not God,
He is just your father.
Because I sat next to a hot stranger on a plane,
a hot, surfing, body-like-the-hottest-Korean-God I’ve ever met kind of stranger.
I know what you’re thinking…this is a great thing, right?
Yeah, it’s the most unoriginal, universal dream on the planet to meet a good-looking stranger on a plane. But it’s still a dream.
We talked and laughed and he added me on Instagram(millennials, man, we’re the worst).
He told me about the places he traveled, how he’s going to Africa in a few weeks, how he spent time in Indonesia and Europe and Australia and lives in San Diego. Life like a dream. The kind of dream the 5-months-ago-younger me would have oozed over. The kind of dream I would have latched onto. The kind of dream that would make me think I’d met my mile-high soulmate.
I mean, it was cool, you know? It was better than spending 2 hours deleting documents off my computer.
But, when he hugged me goodbye, I didn’t feel anything.
Because I realized that you are my stranger on a plane.
You are the one I want to sit next to.
I want to be the 17A to your 17B.
And that is why I am utterly and foolishly f*cked.