is not always easy.
realizing that you are fully responsible for your own reality.
to feel so fragile
and vulnerable to the world around you.
but that is why babies take such small steps.
everything is as new to them
as it is to you right now.
there is something kind of shallow
about the way the sun is always shining.
life is rich in feeling
not just in paper.
full of clouds and rain
and other forms of precipitation
that remind us we are only human
that things change
that there are things far bigger than us-
keeping us on the ground
and not always floating.
the space between where you are
and where you want to be
is still a beautiful space.
there is nothing wrong with
wanting to romance yourself.
you are not in love with him
you love the way he makes you feel
like you are beautiful and
can be whole again.
like you are invincible.
he is noble
he has shown you that you are more.
but you have always been more
it just took some of him to make you see this.
and that is ok.
it is called growing for a reason.
you were the fingers interlaced
inside my fingers.
on my face.
i was willing to take.
i was afraid,
but i was more curious than my fear.
while you let your worry get the best of you.
worry of the future
of what you might miss out on.
your own worst critic,
something i am not unfamiliar with.
but i have learned to embrace my flaws,
while you drown in the insecurity of yours.
playing it safe,
so what you missed out on
was every unfamiliar piece of me.
there is the uncertainty-
the questions we ask,
the judgement we give,
in a world where maybe comes before yes,
and the buffet of choices is so large,
it would take weeks to walk through the line,
our trays overflowing,
pesto noodles, two people
and three jobs on the floor,
who am i?
is this right?
its so loud-
all of this uncertainty.
love is louder.
so much louder.